Regrets of a Poor Choice
Part memoir, part discourse on American politics in 2025, part speculation. How all these themes connect in German, Poland, and the United States.
Difficult People You Can’t Help Loving
Anne Enright's novel, The Gathering, concerns the death by suicide of the narrator's brother. The gathering refers to the mostly family mourners at the funeral. The suicide was conflicted, of course, but also described as the kind of person you search out for friendship. He reminded me of my also deceased partner.
Early Birthing and Later Consequences
An appreciation of Howard Norman's novel Come to the Window, with relevant tie ins to my own birth and disjointed trajectory into old age.
Playing a Role
The lesson learned from trying to be something I was not; that is, an actor.
Black History Month 2025
Black History Month has a half century history, since Gerald Ford inaugurated the celebration in 1976. Until 2025 the month was actively celebrated by our government. That has changed now in the emerging Trump dictatorship.
How to Be a Bully
Bullying is widespread, even endemic, in American society. It's a behavior that many of the powerful segments of society, including politicians, engage in.
Keep Going Or Jump Off
With the advent of artificial intelligence, Medium, the writers' collective is getting a lot of writers submitting articles using AI. This article explains why I don't use AI to do my writing for me.
From “I Wish You Weren’t” To “I’m Good With It”
A history of the long process of coming out to my mother and the reasons she had to fear accepting me.
Strong Gay Men
Douglas Murray's book The madness of crowds is an antagonistic conservative reaction to identity politics, including gay men. This response is a consideration of why adopting a strong identity is necessary for groups to create strongly grounded individuals.
Loss and Disappointment
When is the right time to tell someone you're gay? Two instances of when it was too late.
Becoming Different: Opening the Door to Gay Society
The stereotype of the gay man fated to be lonely and alone has with the gay rights movement gotten less true. There's still a gay life after 40 or at least there can be.
Talking With Strangers
Making friends from strangers has never been easy. The reasons I've analyzed in my own case are tied to who I am as a personality, but also who I chose to be.
Think You’re Too Old to Start a New Language?
Learning continuously is important in aging well. Learning a language is shown to be especially beneficial.
This Is Who I Am: Why I Tell People I’m Gay Even If They Know
A personal account of how and why I became comfortable with telling others, including strangers, that I'm gay.
Places To Go and Places To Be
I love where I live and this is the story of how that came to be. The story is also an appreciation of one of Barry Lopez's essays about connection to place.
The Proverbial Fat Lady Is Still in Good Voice
Going from one later decade of life into another. Looking back, looking forward.
I Playacted at Being Straight. Here’s Why I Stopped.
Coming out as a gay male in the 1060's was a lonely process. This is a story about how I arrived at the decision to come out and why it was necessary.
What is it like to be an LGBTQ teenager?
Some thoughts about what it's like to be queer and young and have to contend with the false expectations the dominant society has about you.
Downsizing and Packing Up
What's the plan to reduce your glut of stuff after you lose your partner. Are you giving up just stuff or memories too?
Better Call Saul for LGBTQIA+ Rights
Saul Alinsky wrote the book on how to get what you need from your society when the powers that be don't want you to have them. He laid the groundwork for the methods that the ACT UP movement used to poke the government to respond to the AIDS epidemic in the 80's and 90's.
The Writing Life Late in Life
The story of how I came to call myself a writer and what it does for me.
Celebrating LGBTQ Resiliency in Appalachia
West Virginia has historically been accepting of LGBTQ people. This article talks about an event I participated in to showcase the stories of a collection of queer individuals across the state.
LGBTQ Safe Spaces in the City and in the Country
A personal recollection of gay bars and a reflection on why there aren't as many of them today as there were.
Is Hoping Worth the Effort?
Hope is a word we typically utter with the expectation of some outcome, usually a positive outcome, but not necessarily. It’s typically triggered by some actual or imagined threat. The hope is made with the prospect of reducing that threat.
Go North Old Man
The story of how I came to be for a while, maybe not long enough, in Newfoundland.
Who Am I to You?
There is a pervasive tendency to label people we don’t like for some reason that offends us. Many labels are pejorative, meant not just to describe, but to tar.
Straight Father and Gay Son
Fathers raise their sons with their own idea of how they will turn out. Straight fathers often don't realize their sons may be gay. This can put a strain on what it means to love and be loved.
Thwarted Ambition
The briefest history of me voluntarily or being forced to change career directions.
Gay and Out In Very Red West Virginia
A positive piece about how West Virginia is not as hateful to LGBTQ people as states farther to the south.
Poet Friends
The story of me and Lynn Kernan. One a would be poet, the other an actual poet.
The Road Taken: Figuring out when, where, and why to turn
Decision points in life can come at you unexpectedly or you can plan for them. This piece relates some decisions of both kinds I made in my life.
That Awkward Feeling
Political polarization weighs heavily on people who don't feel comfortable at either pole. How do you find a comfortable position on the spectrum?
Ambition
Why does a person at 78 decide to take on what is essentially a new job that they have no formal preparation for? There's got to be a reason, yes?